Wednesday, 20 June 2018

I sent my child to nursery* for a better life - and what happened next shook me to the core

This nursery was the kind of place where dreams come true - or so we were told. Our children would be happy and safe. They would have better life chances and the opportunity to make friends with a diverse range of people. Of course, there would be a settling in period and like most places, we would be able to stay with our children until they were confident and comfortable with the adults in the setting...

I sent my child to nursery for a better life - what happened next shook me to the core - replace nursery with America and classrooms with cages

This particular nursery can be rather exclusive and over subscribed. Places are usually reserved purely for those of a certain level of financial wealth, a family or friend recommendation or those who simply ‘fit the mould’....but we had heard about an opening and we took our chance. We clawed together a reservation fee to save our place and went on our way.

The first day of nursery arrived and we were all feeling a little nervous about how it would go. We packed our bags and waved goodbye to our home ready for our adventure. Holding hands tightly I tried to hide the fact that I was slightly worried about the kind of reception we would receive once we arrived, we aren’t the usual type for this particular setting but I told myself we had just as much right to a great future for our children than anyone else in this world right?


Wrong.




As soon as we arrived we could tell that something didn’t feel right. The staff at the setting were uniformed, regimented, authoritarian. There were no smiles or welcoming gestures. No effort was made to put the children at ease despite their obvious feelings of nervousness - they could sense the same air of unkindness that I could and their little hands clung to mine tightly.

We walked further down the path and could hear the sound of children crying - not just one child...lots of children...tiny classrooms full of children, with their sensory space blankets crunching and crackling around their sobs ... were these children new? Were they struggling to settle in to their nursery? Where was their key worker?? Why were the adult to child ratios not being adhered to in this setting? I had so many obvious questions about the procedures at this seemingly free world nursery and yet everyone who worked here seemed to be acting as if this was acceptable process.


Suddenly, the tug on my arm became stronger. My own children began to cry as their grip tightened to a level I had never known, their little fingers intertwined in mine, their tiny nails digging into my flesh as they scraped down the palm of my hand, along my fingers and away....away Into the tiny little room with the noisy blankets, the pools of tears and the cries of ‘mummy’.


The staff were forceful and steadfast - they lead me away down a corridor further inside the Center to await an interview. Further away from the cries of my children, to a room with a person where I must try my best to explain why our place here is just as valuable as theirs.


And still I wait. And I wait. And my children sit in their tiny room*, without their mummy, wondering if they will ever see me again. I sent my children to nursery* for a better life - and they have already left scars deeper than you can imagine. They have already taught my children about unkindness, lack of tolerance and their perceived place in this world. All the lessons they didn’t need to learn.

I sent my children to nursery for a better life - but what we really need is a better world.


*Replace 'nursery' with 'America', 'room' with 'cage' and 'Staff' with 'Border Patrol Agent' - this is what is currently happening at US immigration centres. Children are being detained in cages, separated from their parents after crossing the US-Mexico border. This is what they call a 'zero tolerance' policy under the Trump administration...and it needs to stop.


Sarah x

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32 comments:

  1. Sarah, I could only read half of this before bursting into tears. A beautifully written, heartbreaking piece xxx

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  2. Wow! This really got to me...Very well written.

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  3. Brilliant post. It's absolutely disgusting isn't it. My sister in law is a child psychologist and she sent a really interesting and disturbing article about the damage it causes.

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  4. People think that this is something that can only happen to "other people" and put it all away in a box marked "not for me". That's the easy option. We really do need to stand up and say how disgusting it is, and that we do pay attention and we do have an opinion. I hope people read this and realise just how easily it could have been them.

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    1. It could be ANY of us if the wrong kind of dictator got into power and decided he/she didn’t like a particular human feature whether than be race, religion, eye colour, name, etc ....we are all human beings and should be treated better than this

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  5. Loved the metaphor you’ve used. Choked me up too - America the land of hopes and dreams built on tolerance has become a dictatorship and these kids are suffering. They’re children for Christ sake.

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    1. It’s a terrible situation. I don’t think adults should be treated this was either but you sort of expect that tolerance will be applied for children ... it’s awful they way they have been treated

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  6. The American situation is despicable and horrifying. It is resemblant of concentration camps and I can not understand how everyday American citizens can sanction this behaviour by freely voting and supporting a man who takes away people's freedoms, their human rights and their basic needs. #ablogginggoodtime

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    1. Absolutely..,.its not even just the beginning of the situation with the Jewish community in the concentration caps...it’s a few steps along the line and dangerously close to something happening that would be too dreadful for words

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  7. Shared everywhere. What's happening is totally wrong and completely shameful. It's also been really sad hearing US friends justify this and seeing it as acceptable. People who when I first met them were kind hearted and compassionate but after years of Fox News have become something else entirely.

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    1. Thank you for sharing. I think issues like these really can make you question the morals of those you thought you knew well and would call a friend. It’s a difficult convo to have but I think it’s worth standing up for what you think is wrong x

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  8. This is such a wonderfully powerful piece. A genius bit of writing to make the reader really understand what is happening, in terms they can understand.

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    1. If only a few more people could put themselves in other peoples shoes before making these kinds of decisions and taking these actions I think the world would be a much more tolerant place

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  9. Thanks for writing this lovely, really well written. Will check out Dylan and me's post too xx

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  10. It’s awful isn’t it . I can’t believe what the world has become and what it is becoming . The poor children z

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  11. Beautiful post Sarah, I really have no words for what has been happening, and you have managed to express it so poignantly xx

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  12. A well written post and one that all gets us thinking and talking about the destruct and just awfulness of things that go one. Things we cannot ignore. Posts like this gets people talking and eventually can support and help to make change! The Willow Tree

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    1. It’s so hard to know what to do to make a difference isn’t it? Sometimes just starting a conversation is all you can do though

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  13. This is so well written. It’s heartbreaking isn’t it? X

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  14. What a brilliant post. You had me gripped. And yes, it is absolutely horrific. The pain that both parents and children must be feeling is unbearable even to think about. Thank you for such a great post. Pen x #KCACOLS

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    1. Yes, I can’t even imagine it...it hurts me to think about it so to be a parent in that situation is on another level. Something I doubt they will recover from

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  15. We are all sobbing here in the states, trying to see how they can right is horrid wrong. They have no idea how to match the kids to the parents? It is mortifying. Hold your kinder close tonight, and every night. xoxo #KCACOLS xo

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    1. It’s absolutwly devastating I cannot get my head around it

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  16. Re read this to my friend tonight know I’ve commented previously but she cried too #KCACOLS

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    1. Thank you - it’s just so sad isn’t it 😔

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  17. Wow, that's so well written and perhaps naively, I wasn't expecting that. Such a sad world. #kcacols

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  18. This is so powerful <3 sharing! #KCACOLS

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  19. Such an emotional post, It is awful what is going on. Thanks so much for linking up at #KCACOLS. Hope you come back again next time

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  20. Sarah, this is an amazing post. Beautifully written and so heartbreaking. It really highlights the atrocities that are going on in America. No child should ever be separated from their parents. It is inhumane and barbaric. Thanks for writing an amazing post. Hugs Lucy xxxx

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